fear-itself

I’ve been putting off this post for a long time. I probably should have written it three years ago. But, each time, I thought to myself, “I don’t want to write about negativity on my blog. I want this to be a positive and empowering space for people (especially women) to be inspired to pick up a power tool and/or complete that DIY project they’ve been putting off.”

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This past week I witnessed and endured something that made my blood boil. Supposed DIY experts belittling women. Most of the behavior wasn’t blatant, it was subtle. Some of it was body language (crossed arms, wide leg stance and a scowl while being asked a question.) And some of it was not so subtle with a condescending comment or tone. And this behavior made me mad. No—take that back—it burned me up inside!

Why? Because I have a dream that one day when any woman walks into a hardware store or a home improvement store it will NOT BE ASSUMED that she isn’t handy or that she is incapable of completing a major home renovation or repair. I dream that there will be a day that the stereotypes about women and men will cease to exist. And I know that any woman that is belittled or turned away from DIY is one less step toward my dream.

lumber_in_acadiaSandra of SawdustGirl.com and myself

Therefore, I think it’s time to address that big fat wall that’s holding us back. What is it that scares you about DIY? Is it the fear of a power tool? The fear of screwing something up?  Of injuring yourself? Of breaking something?

Well, it’s time to break down that wall!

First, you need to peel back those layers and really address why you don’t think you can. Did you get messages from others that became part of your beliefs about your own abilities?

How was that wall built? Did it start when you were a child? Did your Dad or Mom tell you not to touch a tool for fear you might hurt yourself? Did your Uncle or neighbor laugh at you when they saw you trying to fix something? What was it? Usually that wall is a culmination of years of messages that get embedded into your brain, until you are stripped of the self confidence necessary to try something new.

Do any of these messages sound familiar:

  • “That’s a man’s job. Let a man do it.”
  • “You might break it.”
  • “You’re not strong enough.”
  • “Why don’t you hire a professional?”
  • “Here, let me help you with that.”
  • “Stand back, I’ll take care of it.”
  • “Don’t hurt yourself.”

Or was it a more subtle message from a professional or someone more experienced who threw a bunch of technical jargon at you making you feel confused or inferior.

I want to share with you some of the nasty comments I receive (especially on YouTube.) The comments are direct assaults on my self esteem and confidence. After reading them, I often begin to doubt my own abilities. Here are just a few of those nasty comments:

  • You really should remove your power tool tutorials. Some idiot is going to seriously hurt themselves.
  • What she is saying is completely wrong esp the part about wetting the caulk but at least she is trying.
  • Woman, you do it wrong
  • Get back in the kitchen where you belong.
  • Women shouldn’t use MAN tools. There is a reason god made you bare children and born with a frying pan in your hand.. This is the same as being a lesbian in my book seeing a woman pick up a tool!

AND then this person left a reply to that last degrading comment:

“Hey dude with the negative comments toward women… disrespectful !  Why can’t a women use power tools?  She can do whatever she likes.  I think you are old school curmudgeon that is afraid of women, and in controlling what they do, that keeps you feeling like KING SHIT ON TURD ISLAND.  Newsflash – we’re in 2014 – get used to it loser!  I hope you are man enough to apologize to Brittany for your loser comments.”

I wanted to high five that commenter! He had it right. There are a lot of people who are threatened by women who can DIY. They view it as a threat to their masculinity. Heaven forbid a woman realize that using a power tool or fixing something isn’t rocket science.

Let me be the first to tell you. You CAN do it! That wall of negative and self-deprecating messages is going to come down NOW! No offense to anyone who is a plumber or knows a plumber, but I sincerely doubt that you have any less brain cells than that guy who’s mooning you while trying to fix your leaky sink. He just has a little more knowledge and experience at tightening slip nuts and p-traps (sorry, I didn’t mean to throw out the technical jargon.) However, when that plumber started, he had no more expertise than you do. He may have been trained in an apprenticeship or trade school But, lucky for you, today there is a wealth of resources to teach you how to fix anything! YouTube, Google, FamilyHandyman.com and many many many blogs that will help you complete a DIY project using step-by-step tutorials!

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Still fearful of using a power tool? Well, here are the facts. If you are safety conscious, you will take the time to read the manual and go slow when learning how to use a new power tool. You will have less of a risk of injuring yourself than a seasoned pro. Why is that? I call it the healthy fear factor. If you respect the tool and have a healthy fear of it, you will double-check that you are keeping your hands and body away from the tool. You will be sure that your hair is tied back and you have removed any jewelry or loose clothing. You will not rush through a cut or task. You will give that tool your full attention and make sure that you are staying safe.

A few years ago one of my favorite contractors told me he had to retire. He had accidentally cut off one of his fingers. This is a man who had been building and fixing for decades! And he cut his finger off. How? He told me, “Brittany, I was stupid. I did not respect that tool and it bit me. I was rushing through a job and cut my finger off with an angle grinder. I’ve used that tool hundreds of times and was complacent and didn’t give it my full attention.” And that is why it is important to ALWAYS respect the tool. It’s okay to have a healthy fear of power tools! In fact, it is what will keep you safe.

I encourage you to take a hard look at that wall of negative attitudes about DIY.

Don’t let someone rob you of your self confidence. If you are reading this post, know that you are an intelligent human being who is capable of much more than you give yourself credit for. Grab that wall and pull it down. Believe in yourself and tackle that DIY project. I’m here if you have questions. I’m here to give you positive encouragement. Just think to yourself, “What Would Pretty Handy Girl say?” and build up a platform of positive thoughts and messages so you can dive off the top of that wall of crap!

What’s the worst that can happen if you do try to fix or build something? If you screw it up, so what! Call in that professional. But, stick right by his or her side and watch how they fix it. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. AND hopefully they will keep their butt crack inside their pants. Should you succeed at the project, rejoice! Celebrate and share with your girlfriends. Let’s break down the stereotype wall together.

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Feel free to leave a comment below about that time you were talked down to or someone made a condescending remark. Let’s all lift each other up and reassure one another that we can do it! High fives all around!

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P.s. This post is dedicated to my blogging friend and fellow power tool wielding DIY Rock Star! You go girl! 

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

Two weeks ago was Teacher Appreciation Week at my son’s school. Every year I have a bit of a knee jerk reaction to this week. Is it because I don’t appreciate my sons’ teachers and administrators? Definitely not true! I appreciate them more than I can ever show. It’s a joke in our house that if I homeschooled, we probably wouldn’t have children. We all need that time away. And, my kids are so headstrong, that they learn much better from talented educators that don’t tuck them in bed at night.

So, why you ask do I have a knee jerk reaction? Let me explain.

Two weeks ago I spent less than 20 minutes whipping up some really cute vases using recycled jars painted with Farmhouse Paint. Wait…What is this paint?

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

Well, it’s “paint formerly know as chalk paint”  (don’t even get me on the soap box about everyone else not being able to call it chalk paint anymore because a particular company has trademarked the name. I mean, that’s like saying that no one can call it latex paint anymore because Brand X trademarked it. Sorry, I get riled up easily.)

Anyway, back to my story, I made these adorable little vases by saving up a bunch of recycled jars.

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

Then I painted them with two coats of Farmhouse Paint. I’m in love with this paint. The colors are vibrant and you don’t need to wax after painting. Just a light sanding with fine grit sandpaper and it give you the same soft sheen as waxing would.

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

After the paint has dried I sand some areas (especially on any writing).

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

Finally, I added some fresh cut flowers from my yard and tied a string around the neck with a personal message.

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

These little vases were adorable. They were cute and they seriously took me less than half an hour to put together (20 minutes to paint and a few more minutes cutting flowers in the yard.)

When I arrived at school, I began distributing the flowers. First the principal’s office — her desk was filled with more flowers vases than a florist’s counter. And the overflow was on her conference table.

     Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

The assistant principal’s desk had the same overcrowded vase problem.

I made my way around to my sons’ classrooms. Tins of cookies and more vases littered their desks. I was sad. Although I knew they appreciated the kind gifts, it must be overwhelming to get everything on one day or one week of the school year.

After the week is over and the cookies are gone, what is there? Nothing. Desks filled with papers to grade of course. But, no gifts; no notes of appreciation; no flowers…nothing.  That appreciation day is long forgotten.

That’s why I’m doing something different next year. Heck, I might even do some appreciating at the end of this school year!

Where are the gifts and flowers during the first week of school when the kids are scared, tired, disappointed, weepy for their Mom and Dad? Where are the gifts when the principal and other administrators have to deal with outraged parents because the school bus didn’t come on time to pick up their child? Or worse yet, what about the day after a weeknight Halloween? I know the children pour into their seats sleep-deprived and burned out after a high sugar evening. Heaven help me this year when Halloween falls on a Friday night. I might check into a hotel for two nights.

Anyway, I’m vowing to appreciate the staff and teachers at my sons’ school on any old ordinary day from now on. I’m sure that a small recycled jar turned into a sweet little vase of flowers will surely brighten the day of one tired educator. I may even slip a little gift card underneath. I know in our state, teachers are not paid nearly enough and we are facing a crisis as teachers leave schools searching for better paying jobs.

To all the teachers, school staff and administrators out there. I APPRECIATE you more than you will ever realize! Please forgive me if I don’t bring you a gift during Teacher Appreciation Week. I’ll surprise you some other time. 😉

Farmhouse Painted (chalk like paint) Jar Vases | Pretty Handy Girl

What do you say? Why not whip up a little painted vase to appreciate your child’s teacher on Monday. Or the last week of school? Or just on one ordinary not celebration day. Am I crazy? Doesn’t this make sense to you?

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P.s. Did you like the chippy paint board backdrop I used? It’s not real wood, it is actually a vinyl backdrop made by my good friend Leen the Graphics Queen. It rolls up and stores neatly away. She should be selling them soon.

 

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DIY Chalk Paint Mason Jar Flower Vase

David Bromstad HGTV host

If I had to choose one HGTV host that I would like to meet in person, that would be a no-brainer. David Bromstad has always been my favorite designer with the transformation talent. With his “push the color envelope” attitude and ever present jovial (and often joking) nature, I think he’d be a blast to meet at a party or maybe collaborate on a DIY project for charity! (A handy girl can dream, right?) The other thing that gains David extra gold stars on my list of celebrities I’d like to meet, is the fact that he’s an artist too.

David Bromstad painting

I am in love with his short painting tutorials on Color Splash. He really knows how to empower others to try their hand at artistic expression.

David-Bromstad-painting_tutorial

You can imagine that I’d be super excited when I received an email asking if I wanted to interview David Bromstad. That email was replied to INSTANTLY! Of course I hoped it meant he was coming to Raleigh, NC and we’d have coffee together and chat. But, you know, that was a dream that didn’t happen this time. Instead, I interviewed David just before the holidays via a phone conversation.

Without further adoration and praise… I have with me (virtually) today: the one — the only — Color Splash host, David Bromstad! Jump on your couches, scream like the Beatles are playing at the Ed Sullivan theater and share my exuberance to have him on the blog today. Read more

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How to Pick Paint Colors

Do you know Lindsay? Makely Home Lindsay (the rockstar blogger formerly known as Living with Lindsay?!)

lindsay - Makely Home

The gal who is so bold with color that her playroom looks like this!

Makely Home Playroom

Well, I have the honor of saying that Lindsay is a friend of mine. But, she is also my idol when it comes to choosing colors. She literally has no fear when it comes to buying paint! When ever I find myself being too safe with color, I think to myself “What Would Lindsay Choose?” And this, my virtual friends, is how I push myself out of my comfort zone.

Glidden has partnered with Lindsay to create some really great Show Me How videos. Check out this short video to learn how Lindsay picks out her beautiful vibrant and daring colors for her home. It’s a great way to be sure before you paint:

If you’re still uncertain, you can try out your color by using this virtual room painter tool at Glidden’s Show Me How site.

Just remember, if you want to push yourself out of that builder’s beige comfort zone, ask yourself “What Would Lindsay Choose?” And you’re halfway done.

Get more tips, tricks and tutorials for your next painting project at Glidden’s new Show Me How website!

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Disclosure: This is a sponsored post for Glidden brand paint. I was compensated for my time to write this post but the thoughts and opinions expressed are my own.

25 Dreamy Blue Paint Color Choices

It’s no secret that one of the quickest and least expensive ways to transform a room is with paint. Choosing the right color, however, can be tricky. It’s always recommended to paint some sample colors in the room you’ll be painting. Both natural and artificial lighting play huge roles in how the hues appear at different times of the day. After you’ve painted samples, see how they look in the morning light, afternoon and with ambient lighting in the evenings.

Many people lean towards neutrals for wall colors, but light blues and aquas bring in the airy tranquil feelings of the sky or surf. Be lulled into a peaceful tranquility by these 25 dreamy blue rooms. You’ll soon discover that these colors do anything but give you the ‘blues’.

Bedroom Beauties:

Young House Love

1. Valspar’s Carolina Inn Club Aqua at Young House Love
John and Sherry balanced the softness of the wall color with rich wood accents.

 

MosaicWorks.ca

2. Benjamin Moore Tranquil Blue at  MosaicWorks.ca
In contrast to natural wood tones, this room simply uses white accessories to create a lovely retreat.

 

Kelly Moore Blue Green Gem

3. Kelly Moore Blue Green Gem at Centsational Girl
Gray and silver accents echo the wall color in a welcoming guest room.

 

Read more